hell is other people

its SUPer muggy outside.

this is something i just revisited, that i'm not mad about. 

also this is great

also this. 

riding the weirdest brainwaves.

Right now something's happening where my eye has been 

twitching for 4 days from lack of sleep/vitamins or 

something. but its no biggie i get to read so much 

SCI FI FEMINISM for next week and for my film class 

i have to watch The Queen and Elizabeth= best week

ever. i'm also about to smoke weed and watch

Showgirls/Orlando/Helvetica AHHHH

academia is both ruining and completing my life.

thisiswhyyourefat.mylife

last night for dinner we had leftover really good mash potatoes, and we fried them in patties and put bacon in the middle.

stoned movies i watched thursday, friday, and saturday night

watched this by myself. its a straight to tv scifi channel type thing that was really great.

como-se-dice my favorite movie. im a man-hater in theory but a bromance lover in practice. 

i'll always love you.

layers in my life.

what if i got a tattoo that was courtney love AS leda (with the swan) AS a pinup girl

losing my mind.

everyone who is into feminism should read this book i just read today

favorite part: there's a prison that this Countess builds to house only female murderers who have killed their husbands thats a pan-opticon. They can only get out of prison if they've shown they repent their crime. Nobody ever feels regret, and eventually the inmates and the guards realize that they are both in prison, and send each other love notes in period blood. They break out of prison and form a colony of women without men after taking semen and freezing it. 

MY LIFE IS PRETTY COOL, GUYS

running themes of awkwardness and hating life.

ALL I WANNA DO

IS SMOKE WEED AND WATCH DARIA 

why does so much of this exist?? also a lot of porny fan fiction. i mean, i guess that kinda cool. 

maybe ill get my mom to scan the picture of me as daria on halloween in 7th grade. 

whats for dinner?

biggest crush of all time (i.e. whats the diagnosis, dr.?)

that entire episode is what i would call THE JACKPOT

WHAT THE EFF.MY.LIFE

things that are ruining my life right now: 

this forecast blows, i know its england but jeeze! whatever happened to may.

zit on my chin thats such a bummer.

This is the book i have to read this week for my postmodernism class. it literally moves backwards in time, from death to birth. its kinda great with a lot of winks at the reader like 'wouldnt it be weird to shit backwards every morning?' and like first the girl slaps you in the face and calls you and asshole, then you sleep together all the time, then you start seeing her around, then she doesnt exist. the real reason i hate it is because my (day)dreaming is all fucked up. 

you know when you find out something you wish you'd never known? i wish i'd never known that jason segel was in oxford, wandering around on thursday night trying to find a cool place to get a drink and meet some awesome americans, and didn't run into me, since i was at home writing a stupid paper. instead he ran into my stupid bro "friend" who didnt even have the decency to call me, now im never talking to him again. (p.s. my teacher ending up canceling our class the next day because she was "sick", then i saw her in town wearing a huge crazy floral wrap with sunglasses on smoking a cig waiting for the bus and we really ignored each other, omg like soooo awkwarddddd. then she sent me an email saying it was tennis elbow, i dont even know) 

WHYWHYWHYWHYWHY ME???? 

i'm not even a weird celebrity hound but i just know that if we would have met, sparks would have flown. here are some other crushes that i'll actually never be close to meeting, that make me feel a little bit better. 

revelationz

chronologically, places i am comfortable: 

places i am uncomfortable: 

pretty self-explanatory. 

this morning i woke up to an email containing this quote: 

No one hates anyone as much as Anna Wald hates everyone.

blahblahblog.

Thelma and Louise just really made me feel like this 

also I don't know why but this really satisfied just now

i like the hollywood sign exploding at the end, pretty redundant. 

things that you forgot happened in Thelma and Louise:

-when they make a truckdriver whos been harassing them pull over, and then they blow up his oil truck cause he won't apologize!

-when some dude with dreads smoking a blunt is bikeriding down the highway and hears the cop they locked in the trunk and blows smoke in his airholes, like WTF?

-probably no one forgot how much of babe a young brat pitt is

YOWZA.

this is an attempt at an unboring post about 'my studies'

so for my women's cinema class i had to watch this movie "Yes" written and directed by Sally Potter in 2004. i watched it for the 2nd time after smoking a little weed which was ideal. first of all, its all in iambic pentameter and half of it is poetry. also, some music by phillip glass, a lot of internal monologue, sexy scenes, a 'chorus' thats moaning mertle as a cleaning lady, religion/death/life/identity/other greatness (POMO). its depressing/epic-uplifting at the same time.  heres the trailer

also tomorrow I have to go watch Thelma and Louise in one of those library viewing rooms which is the best homework ever. 

Another rad thing I watched for that class is the Spike Lee Joint (eh) 'She's Gotta Have It'. it's enjoyable and extremely offensive at the same time. (my paper title was literally 'She's Gotta Have It': the (Mis)Representation of Black Female Sexuality. my life rulez) the main good thing is how great Spike Lee looks

theres a lot of great fashion things happening all around.

in case you're in the market for the most depressing book ever you should check out Empire of the Sun by J.G. Ballard. I really was pushing trying to write an essay about how historical war fiction can push into the realm of science fiction. I realized I couldn't back up that point but it was fun to try for a lil. get that shit if you haven't cried from a book in a while. 

other things im thinking about:

weed, pizza, wanting to see the new star trek movie, gossip girl tomorrow night, being on celebrity gossip sites so much that i feel like i am literally on the set of New Moon. 

the one blog i often wish i had thought of first is sorry-mom.com. why didn't i have the foresight for this? its a blog for people to anonymously post about the worst dude they've ever slept with. this is like a roundtable discussion with my friends but from all over, with girls i'd never hang out with. 

THATSALL I GOT FOR NOW 

weirdest witch.

here are some things that have been on my mind. 

moon cycles, McClintock effect, witchy women, wicca. 

I've never been this girl, but i kind of wish i was. 

pretty accurate. 

the future is now

so sure i'm taking a postmodern literature class here at oxford, but shit is overlapping like whoa. INSTANT NOSTALGIA is something i've been thinking a lot about lately. i hang out here on the internet a lot, and feel like i can see the 'new cool' becoming the 'old lame' before my eyes in seconds. e.g. funny swine flu facebook statuses becoming totallywack before its even a 'pandemic'. the internet is whole different arena of postmodern mind-booglation because of everyone's sense of CONSTANT IRONY. Anna asked me where Amanda was when they are both at SLC and I said 'she's on ghat' because, i was talking to Anna on ichat, when before we'd been talking on facebook chat, but ghat was where amanda could be found in bronxville to ask her a question. And to be quite frank i literally LOLd. i skyped with my mom and grandma for mother's day today, and then afterwards me and my brother shared our screen grabs of the absurd event we both participated in. immediate recognition of something you do everyday as totally ridiculous and existing in the 'non-reality' is something very much of only our generation. generation aim. 

this is something moving past this:

into something else. In my class we really talk about things like this: 

and 

but thats a whole different story. what im trying to say is naked rhianna pics leak and then her publicists statement less than an hour later? "have you seen that one youtube clip" embarrassment. pretending internet life is separate from real life. 

my point is the retro/future is now. 

dream on.

Even though these days i usually sit around in sweatpants, i'd like to say for the record that in the grand scheme of things, here's pretty much what i'm going for :